Based on the book Marriage for Destiny by Funke Felix Adejumo
Locating a unique partner is a big deal that is crucial to the cycle of life; that when taken for granted, slows down the life journey of various people who are in the wrong union.
These 3 questions are the questions you must ask and answer very honestly to find your life partner. You are the best searcher of your heart. You cannot deceive yourself. As you prayerfully wait on the Lord, He will ensure your safety. Remember that love may be blind, but marriage is an eye-opener!
Also, don’t expect that you will see the sign of the cross on his or her head, there will be no specific mark to identify your unique partner. So you must listen to God’s guidance when he speaks to you as his child – through his word.
On the issue of finding a unique partner, it is important to stress that you must be able to hear God in matters of life. If you don’t understand how God speaks to you, you are not likely to understand Him on the issue of marriage. So, as a child of God, endeavour to develop your hearing ability in relation to how God speaks.
Here are the three questions to consider in order to identify the partner that is right for you:
- WHERE you can find such a partner. People of like minds get attracted to each other by chance or fate. So, WHERE does not matter much as WHO, and the twist is that what matters is YOU. If you don’t measure up to the partner you desire, you may never meet each other. And so long it is God’s will for your life, he will allow you to meet yourselves ANYWHERE, ANYTIME. In the church, marketplace, at a gathering, in the plane or at the motor park!
Be reminded that being the right person is much more important than finding the right person. Like attracts like. Whatever you want in a partner, you must be ready to give.
- WHAT you should look out for in your life partner. Attributes like intelligence, kindness, sense of humour, attractiveness, or reliability will come to mind. And regardless of whatever you are looking for in a potential partner, you may end up choosing a person that doesn’t necessarily match your criteria for an ideal companion, because in reality; “people don’t always want what they say they want.” Humans are not perfect at all, yet lookout for someone who is emotionally mature, open to feedback, honest about things, sensitively respectful, independent, empathetic, physically affectionate, and is funny with a healthy sense of humour.
- HOW you will pinpoint the partner for you. The means or process by which you eventually determine who to marry depends on the depth and clarity of analysis you invest yourself into. Your analysis and conclusions will require that you give clear answers to the following questions:
- Do you sense a leading of the Lord about him/her?
- Do you like him/her?
- Are you of the same faith? Religion is quite crucial in marriage than you may feel.
- Are you ready to spend the rest of your life living with him/her?
- Is he/she a man/woman of your dream? Or is he/she near it?
- Will you be proud to introduce him/her as your husband/wife?
- Will you be proud to introduce him/her as the father/mother of your children?
- Do you have peace in your heart?
You can confirm their answers through the test of time and people around you, i.e. you must observe your intending partner very closely and listen to remarks made about he/her within their network of colleagues.
Again, I want to you know that being the right person is more important than finding the right person. It is a core driving quality of anyone that wants to locate a partner for themselves. Because finding the right partner is not like finding a person to assist your research project, business campaign or finding that great candidate that you headhunted to fill a vacancy – it means finding a unique human that you can see yourself living and growing older with – FOR LIFE.
You will agree that if you want a wonderful life partner; you must endeavour to be one. After all, ‘iron can only sharpen iron’ so that ‘birds of the same feather can flock together.’
“A disciplined person is a gem any day. A responsible spouse is an asset. Don’t be attached to a ‘Jezebel’ or a ‘Delilah’. Your life is a trust. You cannot afford to waste your destiny. Look well before you leap into marriage and guard your life jealously. You cannot live twice!” – Funke Felix-Adejumo