Funke Felix-Adejumo

Power of Positive Parenting – The Better Method of Fostering Spiritual Discipline in the Home.

Discipline has never been pleasant, all classes of humanity hate it, youths hate it and adults pretend to like it: but the natural human instinct resents discipline because we don’t realise the difference between spiritual punishment and spiritual discipline. 

Spiritual discipline cannot be achieved by oneself, many people are in the error of being disciples of their own. The difference between spiritual punishment and spiritual discipline is that the former is expressed in form of short-term and immediate consequences while the latter is a long term process that produces a kingdom lifestyle. Spiritual punishment is focused on self, empowered by self and made for self; while spiritual discipline is inspired, nurtured and strengthened by God’s spirit.  

The outcome for both also differs because discipline yields self-control, contrary to the irrational consequences of spiritual punishment. Spiritual discipline is planned systematically. Spiritual punishment is never planned but triggered and fuelled by anger and reluctance.

Remember this,

“God disciplines us for our good, so that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”

In real life, when you ask Christians about their spiritual life, the usual response is, “I am trying.” Arguably, such replies confirm that a lot of Christians practise spiritual punishment in contrast to spiritual discipline.

Put in mind that,

“You are not self-made; You are God made!”

The essential reason for your rebirth is not to “make heaven i.e. become an occupant of heaven” if so, all should be raptured instantly after confessing the faith, but Jesus left you on earth to become disciplined children than to harbour undisciplined children in his kingdom; howbeit that in heaven you drop your phone and it gets stolen?? 

So, God is not interested in undisciplined children, he is rather interested in those who have imitated the life of Jesus as beloved children. 

“After rebirth, you must be very careful, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.”

You need to keep increasing the effectiveness + efficiency of the spiritual processes and resources you engage in, to ensure a great character and competence in work.

There are three (3)  fundamental “I’s “ through which you can become more like Jesus.

  1. Intimacy through study. This yields a thriving walk with God and enabling confidence in him. 
  2. Imitation through lifestyle. You confirm the character of Christ in you towards others.
  3. Impact through work done. You must express your work for God and competence in ministry.
Adapted from an expository talk by Dr Toyin Ogundele delivered in Chapel of Faith, May 2021

Home as the root of societal discipline – the major responsibility of parents.

Biologically, the human cell is defined as the basic unit of life; in the actual world, the basic unit of society is the home where value systems are formulated and shaped. Thus, parents must spend quality time with children because this way we can transform their values and principles to maintain stability.

Put it this way, in a large gathering we gain information to our head, in a small gathering of 6 – 12 we achieve interaction with our mind, and in one-on-one, we accomplish a transformation from our hearts. 

With this in mind, the disposition of a parent’s cravings/indulging desires will eventually get passed down to the children. If it excludes a sound spiritual heritage (quiet time, fasting, prayers, godliness), but is about things that that concern the world (dressing well, academic excellence, eating great foods, going on pleasure trips, having fun with friends, attending weekly parties or engaging in endless gossips and political chit-chats etc.), it is inevitable that such child will grow into an adult void of basic spiritual disciplines that should guide him into becoming a model citizen that blesses humanity.

For example, the magnifying attention of parents concerning the academic excellence of their wards is yielding intelligent fools who grow up excelling intellectually but exist without sound value/principle systems upon which s/he can navigate life’s complexity in manners that blesses humanity or even benefits the society.

You must know that God’s purpose for the home was clear when He said, “…for I have chosen him(Abraham) so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just so that the Lord will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him.”

Also, God’s promise to bless nations stems from effectively parenting our wards carefully and painstakingly teaching, instructing, rebuking and training them righteously to live lives that express the values of a pious society, and a kingdom lifestyle.

At this point, it is obvious that mere instructions cannot transform children but effective parenting at home can only be achieved by: 

  • Firstly, looking inward to renew your habitual tendencies to make sure you reflect God’s image; 
  • Then impressing God’s commandments on your children by talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, ie down, and get up. 
  • Go on to make sure your appearance and accessories symbolise God’s commandment everywhere you go. 
  • Lastly, vividly write them on the doorframes of your houses and your gates. 

Let the world know you are for God, for what you do with your hands, tell a lot about where your heart is! 

Additionally, by using the acronym R.P.D. you will never get wrong in transforming your ward to acquire the kingdom lifestyle. 

  1. REPETITION of God’s truths by recitations, reading and teaching; 
  2. PROCESSING of the info by discussing it with your ward and modelling a pious life. 
  3. DISPLAY it in written forms on your doorframes and symbolize it through accessories and wears. 

Dear parents! 

You must focus on developing your wards so that even if life happens and you get busy, learn to admit your weakness without leaving this huge responsibility to the church or school, but consider signing up your wards for special spiritual classes that will nurture their souls! 

Without this investment from you, your ward will inevitably get his/her discipleship from the television, environment, social media or his/her peers.  

Conclusively, the routine in which you and your children individually study God’s word, engage in fellowshipping, manage personal struggles, and undertake spiritual fasting sessions are four things that will shape positively all the efforts to discipline your children as a parent. 


The power of positive parenting is available to those who are determined enough to raise a new generation of godly and globally responsible adults.

On This Video: Watch Rev. Funke Felix-Adejumo’s unparalleled exposition on what it takes to be a great parent: the need, strategies, and keys. 

Watch the concluding Part here,

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